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GRE写作范文五十九

The University of Claria is generally considered one of the best universities in the world because of its instructors\' reputation, which is based primarily on the extensive research and publishing record of certain faculty members.  In addition, several faculty members are internationally renowned as leaders in their fields.  For example, many of the faculty from the English department are regularly invited to teach at universities in other countries.  Furthermore, two recent graduates of the physics department have gone on to become candidates for the Nobel Prize in Physics.  And 75 percent of the students are able to find employment after graduating.  Therefore, because of the reputation of its faculty, the University of Claria should be the obvious choice for anyone seeking a quality education.  

The argument states that anyone who is looking for a quality education should choose The Universtiy of Claria based on the instructors they have to offer.  The argument assumes that students can learn better from faculty members who are internationally renowned and who have been invited to universities in other countries to teach.  The proof of their argument rests on the fact that two recent graduates have been candidates for the Nobel Prize in Physics, and that 75 percent of their graduates find employment upon graduation.  

According to the argument, strong faculty members help determine the quality of education that a student will recieve at a particular institution.  The passage does not clearly state whether or not the faculty members that were included in the research were actually instructors.  Neither does it offer any examples of the variables and procedures of the research.   Assuming that the faculty members are actually instructors, their assumption would be a fair, for the students in the English and Physics departments.  However, these examples are vague and would not allow a fair determination.  

This argument does compare the findings with other universities which may compete.  It assumes that a 75 percent graduate employment rate is one of the best employment rates of all schools, and that it is the only school whose graduates have been nominated for a Nobel Prize.  It also doesn\'t say whether or not the graduates nominated actually won the Nobel Prize, and in fact, a candidate from another university may have done better.

The argument is not strong enough to be convincing to the reader.  It needs to have more background information as to the type of research conducted to make the assumption, and it needs to have more examples of the strength of the faculty members and graduates.  Finally, it needs to have comparisons with other universities and their competing credentials  

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