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GRE写作范文五十八

The University of Claria is generally considered one of the best universities in the world because of its instructors\' reputation, which is based primarily on the extensive research and publishing record of certain faculty members.  In addition, several faculty members are internationally renowned as leaders in their fields.  For example, many of the faculty from the English department are regularly invited to teach at universities in other countries.  Furthermore, two recent graduates of the physics department have gone on to become candidates for the Nobel Prize in Physics.  And 75 percent of the students are able to find employment after graduating.  Therefore, because of the reputation of its faculty, the University of Claria should be the obvious choice for anyone seeking a quality education. 

While it is true that the facts presented in the above passage contribute to the idea that the University of Claria is a fine university, it can hardly be concluded from the propaganda that the University of Claria is the best university for every applicant.  For example, it appears, based on the passage, that the University of Claria is largely a research-oriented university.  No where in the passage, however, is the quality of the education discussed.  The faculty/student ratio is not discussed.  It is largely possible that while many of the faculty are teaching at universities in other countries, the students at U. Claria are left being taught by graduate students or non-doctoral instructors. 

Secondly, the passage states that 75 percent of graduates from U. Claria find jobs.  One wonders where these graduates obtained their jobs.  It is possible that very few graduates are able to find work in their fields of major.  The number of graduates who enroll in graduate school is also not disclosed.  One would expect a large number of graduates from a research-oriented university to pursue research careers.  These students would undoubedtly require a graduate school education, rather than simply a Bachelor\'s level degree.  By stating that 75 percent of graduates find employment, the reader is left to wonder why these students entered the workforce, rather than graduate school, since graduates with Bachelor\'s level degrees often do not land research-oriented jobs. 

Lastly, the socioeconomic status of the institution is not disclosed.  Perhaps the University of Claria is an expensive school located in the heart of a large metropolitain city.  Certain prospective applicants to the university may not be able to afford such a costly school, nor may the like the idea of living in a crowded metropolis.  The fact that the argument leaves our the socioeconomic status of the school leads the reader to believe that the school perhaps has something to hide; perhaps its socioeconomic situation is not something it is proud of.  In addition to the "sales pitch" passage, above, the argument should include facts that a diverse group of students may find useful, such as the cost of education and the quality of its teaching program.  Only after evaluating all the facts might a student strongly agree that the University of Claria is one of the best universities in the world. 

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